TOPLESS

I had another weird dream this morning before I woke up. I was shopping for motor oil, but for some reason, it was a struggle. The motor oil kept turning into loaves of bread.

On top of that, I was being tormented by these young guys who were shopping for beer. I wasn't wearing a shirt and feeling self-conscious. 

When I was trying to check out with the cashier, there seemed to be some confusion. The cashier needed me to give her my email address, and somehow, I managed to buy a bunch of crap that I didn't want.

When I got back to my apartment complex, they were constructing a swimming pool on the property. 

Inside my apartment, I started getting messages from the cashier from the store. She was sending me movies of her and this other woman laying topless out in some back garden somewhere. I found myself attracted to her even though she appeared to have very small eyes.

I realized the reason she wanted my email address was to make contact with me.

Then they got up and went into a building. Inside, there was a big party going on and people were dancing.

I found myself feeling jealous because their lives seemed much more exciting than mine. 

THE AMUSEMENT PARK

I have this recurring dream. I'm at an amusement park. I'm always trying to make my way to the big roller coaster. 

I never get there.

I think it's symbolic.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DAD

Today is my dad's birthday. He was born on 3/3/36 and died on 6/30/06. I always associate him with those numbers.

When he and my mother separated, he rented a trailer home in Paradise Cove. He would take us there on weekends. He showed us how to make people out of paper. He was very creative that way. We made a whole western town.

He was an intellectual. He was a huge admirer of Einstein. At the same time, he also had a very passionate love for art. 

When we went to visit him, he always showed us a good time. He had a luxurious car and drove us all over Los Angeles. He took us to nice restaurants, movies, Dodger games. He exposed us to culture. One summer, he took us to Europe.

He loved life and people. He was always telling us stories about things he experienced.

He was very open-minded and diplomatic. He was liberal but listened to conservative talk radio. He was agnostic but very involved in the Christian Church. He loved conversations and was a good listener. He got along with everybody who knew him.

He would have been eighty-eight if he was alive today.

Sometimes he visits me in my dreams.

FEBRUARY

I realized I haven't posted anything this month. I guess it was a combination of distractions...

I interviewed for a promotion that I didn't get.

I took a vacation to California, and it rained the whole time.

I guess I was not feeling that particularly inspired.

It wasn't as if anybody was reading this stuff anyway.

MORNING CALL

I got a call from the store manager this morning. He was wondering why I wasn't at work. 

I told him that I woke up this morning, decided to shave off all my hair, go on the Mediterranean Diet, become a Buddhist, and start writing a novel.

"So, you're not coming in today?" he asked.

"No, I don't think so," I replied.

THE RAIN ON MY WINDSHIELD

The rain pounced on my windshield while I was on the freeway. It became hard to see and was very stressful.

I need the sky to clear.

I need to be able to see the road ahead.

I need to start working closer to home.

A MYSTERY

I want to write a story. I need an idea. I was thinking of starting very simple, and then slowly creating more elements. I was thinking about a mystery.

I don't know what I'm thinking.